Tuesday, April 15, 2014

M is for Marriage

Till Death Do You Part... or maybe not...

Growing up I never heard about divorce within our family. Divorce was a foreign concept to me. As I matured I learned through other families the effects of divorce. When I was younger my belief was that nothing should break the vows of marriage. It is something between a man, woman, and God. When I entered the early years of my adulthood, I then evolved to consider the only reasons I would accept divorce and confirmed within the Bible as well; if there is adultery or abuse.

"It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement" Matthew 5:31-32

In other words, if a man should degrade his wife by any means, then a divorce is acceptable in the eyes of the Lord. Originally the covenant was made as a way that pleases God, and he looks at the man with favor when he honors his oath and his wife. When he mistreats his wife, it would be like mistreating the church in Gods eyes, thus the adultery.  Our society is so accepting of adultery that there seems to be little, if any, stock in marriage. In our society we marry for status, to have children, or to have security. To honor the person you love is probably never thought of (until your Pastor or Priest mentions it).

"When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it comes to pass that she finds no favor in his eyes.... then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give [it] in her hand, and send her out of his house." Deuteronomy 24:1-4

Originally the Bible says to not marry, but if you should...[follow these rules]. A man should honor his wife and a wife should honor her husband. There is a specific instruction manual and when you sway away from it, it's when it gets messy and complicated. Unfortunately, I have experience in this department. I thought I was marrying for love and that we would grow old together, I had entered my covenant with commitment and faith. My husband cheated and instead of working on the marriage, he opted to leave our holy covenant with God. The Bible is clear about his choice and those that cheat on their marriage:

"[But] whoso [commits] adultery with a woman [lacks] understanding; he [that does this had destroyed] his own soul." Proverbs 6:32

So, the question is now - do I still believe in the sacrament of marriage? Yes. A true man will honor the woman he loves. If a man takes a woman (sleeps with her) than he should be of intent to propose marriage to her. In our society it has become acceptable that a man and a woman live together before marriage. Years can pass before the paperwork is signed, rings exchanged, and vows are stated. Even then, the statistics are against them - they'll still divorce. Faith, Hope, and Love keep us within reason and fills us with the belief that a marriage can last. I've never had the whole white dress, flowers, and the whole wedding ceremony thing (not even my first marriage). The future isn't looking very promising either (for marriage). While it has not worked for me, I still believe because I know God wants me to believe in His promises.